If you have read my posts this is an update on how I am doing. I am currently dating a new girl...who pays for my fears that I have from my past. I feel horrible, I need therapy..to prideful. Anyways...this was on my mind.
What really gets to me is the confusion, did she really play
with my head, enable me to become an addict to ruin me, or is that all make
believe? Am I telling myself that to make myself feel better? This is a mind
f$%^ obviously. I met her on the internet. From day one I did know something
was off way off and I called her psycho. I did this because I went on like one
date with her and then she sent me flowers and she came on very strong. It was
like phases with her and that is why I know she was a sociopath.
She showered me with trips and gifts and all of these things
like tiffany’s bracelots necklace charm, rings, trip to Mexico and to Chicago.
Trips I will never forget. These things soon stopped though. She became bored
of me. I could tell. Although she still made dinners and acted like a wife, I
knew she was pulling away. I could feel it. The push/pull….she degraded me.
Anything that my cats did was my fault, every little thing she nit picked and
then all of a sudden she was done with me. She wanted me out of her house.
Before I could get out she was already with a new girl. That’s where all my
attention went. Within 2 weeks she was moved in. It breaks my heart she doesn’t
think of me………how can someone fool you for so long? I was with her for 5 years
and thought she was this loving person….boy was I wrong. I should have been
sleeping with one eye open….What do you think? Sociopath? Narc?
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